The Trip, Side 3: Watching The World End

by Dr. Pants

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1.
Robot Spiders (free) 03:53
TATTOO TED LEFT HIS HOUSE ON THE BEACH TO MEET THE GIRL FROM THE DATING SITE AFTER HE PARKED THE CAR, HE WALKED IN, HIT THE BAR AND ORDERED TWO GLASSES OF WHITE SHE WALKED IN AND HE WAVED WITH A GRIN SHE SAID, “HI” AND STUCK OUT HER HAND SHE SAID, “YOU MUST BE TED,” HE SHOOK HER HAND AND SAID “THAT WOULD MAKE YOU LEIGHANN” LEIGHANN WAS SO BEAUTIFUL, TED THOUGHT HE MIGHT GO BERSERK TED BECAME VISIBLY EXCITED WHEN SHE ASKED HIM WHAT HE DID FOR WORK I BUILD ROBOT SPIDERS ENGINEERED TO KILL AND REPLACE THE PEOPLE YOU AND I CALL THE HUMAN RACE AND ALL I WANT IS A LOVING FRIEND TO SIT IN MY BEACH HOUSE WITH ME AND WATCH THE WORLD END LEIGHANN RAN SCREAMING FROM THE RESTAURANT BUT TED FIGURED HE’D TRY AGAIN HE SET A RENDEZ-VOUS WITH BETTY SUE AT A COFFEE SHOP AROUND THE BEND LEIGHANN HAD BEEN CUTE AND CLEVER TO BOOT BUT BETTY SUE PUT HER RIGHT TO SHAME THEY TALKED FOR A SPELL, THINGS WERE STARTING TO GEL SO THEY WENT TO GO BOWL A FEW FRAMES TED WAS AVOIDING THE LINE OF DISCUSSION THAT RUINED HIS LAST DATE THEN BETTY SAID, “HEY, WHAT’S YOUR JOB? “I DON’T THINK I EVER GOT THAT STRAIGHT.” “IF AT FIRST YOU DON’T SUCCEED,” TED THOUGHT, AS HE DROVE TO MEET JOY HE TRIED A DIFFERENT APPROACH AND ASKED FIRST HOW SHE WAS EMPLOYED AND JOY SAID TO TED I BUILD ROBOT SCORPIONS ENGINEERED TO KILL AND REPLACE…
2.
Collections. 05:34
Collections.
3.
No Funkies 03:54
NO FUNKIES WE DON’T WANT NO FUNKIES IN HERE THEY SMELL REALLY BAD AND THEY DRINK ALL OUR BEER WE DON’T WANT NO FUNKIES IN HERE I WAS OKAY A FEW YEARS AGO WHEN THERE WERE JUST A FEW AROUND BUT NOW IT SEEMS LIKE THEY’RE EVERYWHERE AND THE SMELL IS BRINGING ME DOWN I WAS OKAY A LITTLE WHILE BACK WHEN THEY STAYED IN THEIR PART OF TOWN BUT NOW THEY’RE LIVING RIGHT DOWN THE STREET AND THE SMELL IS MAKING ME FROWN THE ONE WHO LOVES ME SAYS I GOTTA LOVE THE FUNKIES EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE TAKING OUR JOBS THE ONE WHO LOVES ME SAYS I GOTTA LOVE THE FUNKIES CUZ THE FUNKY HELPED ME WHEN I GOT ROBBED THE FUNKY HELPED ME WHEN I GOT ROBBED THE FUNKY HELPED ME WHEN I GOT BEAT THE FUNKY HELPS ME WHEN I’M DOWN AND OUT THE FUNKY HELPS ME WHEN I’M ON THE STREET THEN ONE DAY I WAS ALL ALONE OUTSIDE OF TOWN, I LOST MY CELL PHONE HIT BY A CAR AND LEFT FOR DEAD THEN ALL I SEE IS A FUNKY’S HEAD HE PICKED ME UP AND CLEANED ME OFF DROVE TO AN E.R. AND DROPPED ME OFF PAID THE BILL AND DROVE AWAY I KNOW, MY HEART, IT CHANGED THAT DAY LOVE THE FUNKIES, WE GOTTA LOVE THE FUNKIES
4.
Natalie 03:40
NATALIE IS THE GIRL I PASS IN THE HALLWAY SHE’S BEEN POPPING UP IN ALL MY DREAMS WHEN SHE WEARS HER HAT SHE’S EASY TO SPOT FROM A DISTANCE YOU KNOW I’D REALLY LOVE TO MAKE HER SCENE I ALWAYS TRY TO SAY HI HALF THE TIME SHE WALKS RIGHT BY SHE BREAKS MY HEART ALMOST EVERY DAY BUT I CAN’T LOOK AWAY NATALIE WHY YOU WANNA BE SO MEAN TO ME? NATALIE I LOVE ONLY YOU, OH, CAN’T YOU SEE? NATALIE ASKED ME ON SUNDAY TO WRITE HER A LETTER SHE SAID SHE LIKES IT BETTER THAN THE PHONE I CHECK THE MAIL EVERY DAY FOR HER RESPONSE NOW NATALIE, BABY, PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME ALONE I GOT HER LETTER TODAY SHE DOESN’T HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY ALL THE THINGS THAT I WANNA KNOW SHE REFUSES TO SHOW SHE SAID YEAH WHEN I ASKED HER TO THE HIGH SCHOOL DANCE I WAS LIVING ON A PRAYER, I WAS LOOKING FOR ROMANCE I TOOK HER HOME, WENT AROUND TO OPEN HER CAR DOOR SHE SAID, “YOU’RE REALLY NICE, BUT PLEASE DON’T CALL ME ANYMORE”
5.
SOMEWHERE IN THE QUITE FAR EAST A BUTTEFLY FLAPS ITS WINGS AND SOME TIME LATER, AROUND THE WORLD, CAROLINA FEELS A HURRICANE’S STING SOME HAVE POSTULATED THAT THESE THINGS ARE RELATED COULD THE SAME EFFECT BE TRIGGERED BY A HUMMINGBIRD OR A FLAG? OR MAYBE A TAIL THAT WAGS? COULD MY DOG CAUSE A HURRICANE? SOME MIGHT SAY THAT A BUTTERFLY HAS AN EXOTIC FEEL I MAINTAIN IT’S NOT AS CUTE AS A KITTEN OR A SEAL I THINK THAT MAN’S BEST FRIEND COULD WIN OUT IN THE END IS IT POSSIBLE MORE PEOPLE WOULD THINK THIS THEORY IS CORRECT IF THEY CALLED IT THE ‘DOG EFFECT?’ PUPPY I CAN’T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY THAT YOUR TAIL COULD BE PART OF A WEATHER CATASTROPHE OH PUPPY WHAT WOULD BECOME OF ME? IF I FORBID YOU FROM WAGGING FREELY?
6.
I Am Yours 03:37
I AM YOUR REAL HERO I AM YOURS ALL DAY I AM YOUR REALY HERO I AM YOURS ALL DAY I AM YOURS, I AM YOURS, I AM YOURS KAREN, I AM YOURS, I AM YOURS, I AM YOURS I AM YOUR REAL CHAMPION I AM YOURS ALL NIGHT I AM YOUR REAL LOVER I AM YOURS ALL NIGHT YOU GOT TO LOVE ME, BABY, BABY, ALL NIGHT

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More rock, funk and all around nerdiness. Robot spiders, dogs causing hurricanes...how could you resist that??

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released April 30, 2012

See digital booklet for details.

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Dr. Pants Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Dr. Pants and Weird Files are the musical monikers of David Broyles, a songwriter/composer from Oklahoma City. Rock, folk, hip hop, electronic music, chamber composition and other things, from a nerdy, quirky perspective.

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